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Jack O' Lanterns

Here are our jack o' lanterns from last Halloween. While I appreciate and admire the work that goes into making all of the fancier and artier jack o' lanterns, I'm a purist. I like my Jacks to look like faces. These are a couple of scary faces that only a headless horseman  could love.

- Alexis Siemen

This is the only pumpkin picture I could find. I think it was from that Halloween when you guys lived in the apartment off Briarcliff. I will keep looking for pictures of last year's unfinished pumpkin. I tried to make a Death Star pumpkin with a rotary Dremel tool. It spit pumpkin juice and thousands of small pieces of pulp all over my dinning room.

-Jason Royal

I was never successful at carving jack o' lanterns until I was given a tool that allowed me to cut with a greater level of detail than my usual tool of choice, the machete. I had the pumpkin, the right tool, and the newspaper under the pumpkin. All I needed was inspiration. An ad in the newspaper featured a gay cowboy, so I took the concept one step further. I would like to state that this pumpkin was carved before the Hollywood movie about the gay cowboys was released, yet sadly after the Pornotown movie about the gay cowboys was released.

- Jay Carlson (2004)

I worried about what the neighbors thought when they saw a jack o' lantern that honored Baby Got Back, but then I remembered that booties are awesome and I don't care what the neighbors think.

- Jay Carlson (2005)

I asked Patti, "What should I carve into the pumpkin?" She said, "Something scary." So I carved a dead body floating in a river next to an apathetic duck. That duck clearly does not give a shit and is trying to figure out which person on the shore is going to feed him breadcrumbs.

- Jay Carlson (2006)

I carved this freehand and am quite proud of it.

- Jay Carlson (2007)

Like usual, I asked Patti what I should carve into the pumpkin. Again she said, "Something scary." Which image from my nightmares did I choose this time? A mama bird feeding her baby bird a drop of blood. This made Patti laugh and laugh, because my nightmares are horribly goofy.

- Jay Carlson (2008)

Probably my scariest pumpkin. Black widow!

- Patti C. (2004)

[It also looks like a cat with whiskers. Just sayin' - ed.]

I have no idea what prompted me to go with a Pac-Man theme. Probably something along these lines: "What's the easiest shape I can carve into this thing and be done in ten minutes? Pac-Man? Done."

- Patti C. (2005)

The bat was from one of those kits. I think it was the easiest one in the package. Don't let his crossed eyes alarm you. Bats rely on sonar to get around and detect objects.

- Patti C. (2007)

I love Halloween, and I love to carve pumpkins. I try to make them pretty bad ass, because carving bats and pirate ships is bad ass.

- Cat McCord (2007)

Plus, scooping out the insides of a pumpkin and scraping the walls to a carvable thickness makes me feel kind of tough, and I like that.

- Cat McCord (2008)

Issue #47: Snakes & Snails & Puppy Wholesales
Issue #47