Mexican Jesus Candle Race
Ladies and gentlemen, The Plug is proud to present the world's greatest luminary race. I invited my pallies to buy a Mexican Jesus candle, and let it compete against other Mexican Jesus candles in non-stop illumination. Whoever's candle out-flames the rest wins absolute religious bragging rights. I know it's not the smartest idea to leave numerous candles constantly lit when I’m not home. Rest assured that I have taken the necessary precautions against a potentially dangerous situation. I'm racing them on the linoleum floor in my kitchen. You know, next to the oily rags.